This is just a free space for me to note my thoughts down so they don’t remain trapped in my head. I am typing this as our group are in worship, there is a guitar playing and so,e beautiful singing. However, I don’t wanna sing. I want to worship with the words Inhave to say. We are on the Saturday of our trip, which leaves four days left and I honestly can say that I will be going home a spiritually changed person.
My relationship with God is stronger than ever even though the sights I have seen are the sights that break your heart. To quote a song: ‘Break my heart for what breaks your’ (Hillsong United) and truly my heart has been broken. I am, in some ways, lucky to be visiting the refugee camps in their current states. Empty. Very few people left, waiting to be shifted and rehoused. Yet my heart cries out for each and everyone one of them. The young beautiful children, now begin there lives in a situation and a home that no child deserves. These children have done nothing and yet they are punished. Families that are torn apart, that are separated and spread across Europe and many left at home. Sadly, even some never made it. How is this fair!?
Surely, the understanding of this, how unfair the situation is would make me lose faith in God. Yet I am empowered. I have and for the first time, felt his spirit and presence in me and move around me. It is an overwhelming feeling I have not felt before.
I was exhausted this morning and I have never felt so tired. I felt broken. I dragged myself out of bed, into my clothes, put on my makeup and left the house. I walked down the street, to the bakery, to the metro station and onto the metro. The lack of energy I had made me feel like I could not continue the day. Yet when we arrived at the refugee centre, the one we were helping to set up, I felt an incredible sensation within me in. Somewhere, someone told me to find strength. I was reminded of a bible verse I looked at before I came on the mission trip.
I was sent. I was chosen. God would not let me run out of fuel. I am here for a reason, this I don’t know yet. Or maybe I do but I haven’t full noticed it yet. God filled me with strength, and I stopped feeling weak. I managed to be filled with strength in my heart and complete loads of work at the refugee centre. I will post pictures when I get hold of them. But from how we saw it the other day, then after the work we did and finally today and after the work we did. It was incredible and I felt like I had really completed a task I was mean to do.
….I think I will leave it there. I am just feeling really encouraged by God right now to share how I felt today. The strength I was given was incredible and I have never felt that way before. I shall close with a few more bible passages that I have really held close to my heart.